but we try and live up to it all the time. That’s a mistake!
(1 min read)
Sex that isn’t you is … well, not you, not real, and not good enough. And you know what they say, “Good enough, isn’t!”
Movie romance, movie love, movie sex can be wonderfully entertaining – and informative – if we see them with clear eyes and an open mind. A good story can leave an indelible impression, which can be good bad or ugly. And when it comes to movie sex, especially for women, it’s usually not so good.
Conversely, a good book with well written romantic and erotic sex scenes is far more realistic, honest, and can be very informative. Whether read on your own or shared with a partner, a good box can go a long way to improving your understanding of human sexuality, sexual needs and sexual performance.
This article from Refinery29, Sex On Screen Is Such An Anticlimax For Women. Where Did It All Go Wrong? examines how Hollywood doesn’t give a damn about telling the story of real sex, which means they don’t give a damn about real women. Of course, most producers and directors are men so, you get the man’s perspective, angle and ignorance. And believe you me, they are ignorant – that goes for most men.
There’s lots of research to show the impact movie and fantasy fake sex has on a person’s performance. The Journal of Sex Research revealed that men’s ‘sexual esteem’ is impacted by whether a woman reaches orgasm or not. Which means movie sex scenes, whether it’s Elaine’s “Fake. Fake. Fake. Fake.” scene (0:21 sec) or Sally’s fake orgasm in When Harry Met Sally (3 min), they all put a lot of pressure on the man’s self-esteem. And the woman’s need to deceive. All of it “fake news” and debilitating.
“In reality, sex is messy, fumbling and awkward.” – Dr. Caroline West
Movies, from Titanic to porn, depict fantasy sex where everything is sweet and smooth, and nearly always from the man’s viewpoint. It’s misogynist. It’s arrogant. It’s fake. It’s wrong.
From Refinery 29 (5 min). Read more >>
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