Avoid orgasms and orgasm hangover …
it is better sex, a better sex life and better for relationships.
(Podcast – 26 min: Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships)
Biologically, orgasms are the antithesis of the bonding power of love. There is an “orgasm hangover” that lasts up to two-weeks and recognizing and understanding it, and its symptoms, is crucial in a relationship. It is deeply embedded in who we are and how we behave. It goes back to how we are “hard wired,” but suffice it to say that if we can learn to orgasms less – yes, less – we will have better sex and a better chance at a more loving and lasting relationship.
Marnia Robinson has written a whole book about it and she discusses it on this podcast. 26 minutes just might change your sex life, forever – for the better.
Here’s the biology brief
“The peak of divorce is at year four.” – Helen Fisher, anthropologist
The vast majority of the animal kingdom do not mate for life and we humans belong to a group of only 3% of the mammal species that actually “pair bond.” Even then, half of us don’t stay together for a lifetime. That’s the epitome of a ‘conflict of interest’ – a biological one that we need to understand – if we want to “fix” this sex-love-relationship-marriage ‘thing’ we spend our lives embroiled in.
It’s about time more of us started understanding the fundamental biological design of “us” so that we have a better chance of creating and shaping more successful pair bonding (a.k.a. marriage or long-term relationship). It starts with fully understanding our need for love and sex, each of which is biologically opposed to the other. I know, I know, it doesn’t make sense until you hear Marnia Robinson, author of Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow explain it. It is an epiphany – in just 26 minutes. Guaranteed you will then want to read her book.
“Most [mammals] just mate furiously during mating season and then they go off to the next partner and neurochemistry is driving them to do that.” – Marnia Robinson
If we truly want to have great pair bonding lives (both love and sex) then it’s critical that we learn why we are not so very different from our animal roots and stop ignoring the genetic behavior that is hard-wired into our brains. If we don’t, we’re walking around with a poisoned arrow stuck deep in our anatomy. Permanently!
Listen to podcast interview with Tom Park at PathWavesShow >>
Read Book Review >>
Return to Orgasm articles >>
Leave a ReplyWant to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!